My night

Hero
(See also: Martyr)
Jaromir Jagr
Orchestrated the first goal of the night then got a bullshit penalty called on him in the last 3 minutes of the game.

Punk
Colby Armstrong (of the Penguins)
Dear Colby,
In hockey sometimes people hit you. Get used to it.
Love,
Kizz

M.I.A.
Darius Kasparitis
According to the gentleman sitting in front of me it's likely that Kaspar wasn't suited up tonight because the team had plenty of healthy players on the roster.
Dear Rangers Coaching Staff,
Healthy does not equal good.
Also, Defense - look into it.
Love,
Kizz

Not to PapaKizz: That penalty killer I was trying to remember a couple of days ago? Dominic Moore. He's still really good at that. Unfortunately this year he's killing penalties for the Penguins.

Other highlights of the evening:
1. An ad along the boards "Superfund: The Future of Investing". Perhaps I'm just old but to me "Superfund" means "Toxic Waste". Superfund clean up sites, remember? I'm so not investing in one.
2. The middle element of a 3 generation all guy spectator party next to me during a tie in the third period, "We need to get a girl in there. You know, put it in the hole?" Klassi.
3. An old man dumped his beer on me (by accident). Two periods later I discovered most of it had soaked the floor and therefore my backpack. Those padded straps suck up the beer real good. So, I smell like the campus whore after a frat party, it's time to walk the dog and go to bed.