Thursday, July 24, 2008

What Do You Propose?

Bourdain is back. I'm grossed out by him and in love with him and am just now realizing that he totally ruins my curve. I say I don't watch any reality TV but I watch Bourdain...and American Gladiators and Mythbusters and I used to watch Queer Eye. I am by no means blameless on this front, or on any other for that matter.

To kick off this new round of shows Bourdain ran a viewer contest to see where he'd go next. They narrowed 1300 entries down to 4 interviews and then he chose to go to Saudi Arabia with a delightful female filmmaker. They ate camel and lizard and a bunch of other stuff, much of which the filmmaker had never tried before. I thought she was super brave and was impressed that she knew about all the stuff that would attract the chef even though she didn't eat it regularly. Throughout the show I wondered what my interview tape would have been. He knows New York better than I do. He's already taken the show to London and Scotland and Ireland, the places I know best. Frankly I'd go anywhere with him (anywhere without snakes) but that'd make for a short and creepy audition tape, wouldn't it? What about NH? What do we eat there? Fried clams, maple syrup, Diary Queen, lobstah? It's all good, sure, really good, but is any of it weird or gross enough to lure Anthony Bourdain? I suspect not.

Now, Gert tells me that she's been stockpiling her beloved reality shows on DVR and will be binging on them shortly. So I thought to myself, "Self? What would everyone else audition for?" So, tell me, what's your reality weakness and what would you do to convince the Powers That Be to put you in front of their cameras?

image courtesy of Google images.


  1. I want to do Amazing Race with DMB. Well, I don't *want* to, but if I had to pick...

  2. i just peed in the floor at little over that picture. and honey, if you think i'm kidding, i'll take a picture for you. damn. first thing in the morning.
    I think I need a cooking show/road trippin/paula dean's boys but better kind of thing. Food. Travel. Me cracking the wise. that's mine.

  3. I already shot a pitch video for my reality tv know, the one where I woo secret recipes out of really hot firemen.

  4. Umm. That picture. I don't know.

  5. I can't think of a single reality show that would appeal to me. Is there one where you sit on your butt typing? Because that is my reality.

    My sister would die to do the Amazing Race.

  6. JRH, what would your pitch to TPTB be? There's so much to recommend the two of you as a kick ass team!

    Zelda, I was just looking for any random shot of the boy but when I saw this one I KNEW it was for you. So, in a way, it was my intention to make you leak bodily fluids and I totally succeeded!

    Chrome, when do we get to see that? That's a reality show I could get behind.

    Kath, it's sort of fabulous and totally wrong all at once, isn't it?

    Seester, I think the question is does she love it so much that you would agree to do it with her just to make her happy?

  7. well done. well done indeed.

  8. I think the taglines underneath us will alternate with:

    Math PhDs

    They're the only ones who understand why they're not together... but they're right

    She once passed out in his arms

    His favorite show ever: Dr. Who; hers: Dawson's Creek

  9. I love me some Tony're exactly right though. Grossed out and turned on all at the same time.

    I am completely, embarrassingly addicted to The Deadliest Catch on Discovery Channel. I watch Mythbusters, too. And Project Runway when I catch it.

  10. Naked Bourdain. You are totally hooked! Read his book? Damn skippy!

  11. I have read one of his books, Kitchen Confidential, of course but I'd kind of like to read some of his fiction.

  12. Would Bourdain qualify as sexy-ugly?

    I can't stop watching So You Think You Can Dance and Intervention. I think those are my only "reality" vices.