Friday, May 30, 2008
Have I told you that this whole thing would have been more efficient if they'd just skinned me Silence of the Lambs style and started over? No? Well, I should have because I've been telling everyone else.
When last we spoke I'd had a punch biopsy of the lip, 3 suspicious moles shaved off the back (3 different ones than the first round) and a wart frozen off the right nipple.
Sorry, has to be said every time we speak of liquid nitro and my nipple in the same breath.
Let's go in reverse order.
Wart dropped right off yesterday. Ewe. But finally!
Just like the first three moles these three are dysplastic and have been entirely removed by the shaving. I haven't looked up the meaning but I'm pretty sure that means that they're suspicious but not dangerous and are now out of the way so we don't have to think about them anymore.
The lip thing is hyperplastic blatty blatty whooochee something or other. Yeah, OK, it was perhaps not my best move to take the Dermatology Idol Results Show call from a corner of the Post Office but I did. Experience tells us that I wouldn't have been any better about remembering or writing this stuff down even if I were sitting at a desk with a pen and paper. The upshot is that it's something which has the potential to develop into a squamous cell which is bad (but still not melanoma so not BAD) and would have to be taken off. We watch and we treat with the A1dera again. I go back in 6 weeks and in the mean time I wait until the biopsy spot is properly healed over then treat with the cream twice a week.
Apparently it's not over until the fat lady sings and we've yet to freaking cast her!
Oh and for the record I don't look this stuff up because it's my understanding that internet searches for medical symptoms are how hypochondriacs with bleeding ulcers are made and I've got plenty of ulcer fodder as it is. I'll google squamous cell soon. But not today. At least not until after I've had a nap.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
OK, actually it's like other people are writing it all for me. Posts relevant to my thoughts on sustainability have been leaping into my path and begging for my attention for weeks now. I couldn't possibly write a full post about each of them but I would love for you to check them out. Pick and choose as you like or read them all, they are each intriguing and important.
Oddly I'm going to start with one that sort of refutes all my foot stomping. Snickollet writes about the decision that she and her husband made to have children even though they knew he was dying and that his death would be sooner rather than later.
This Curbed post addresses the consumer level of sustainability. It links to an article about using your money locally to support the people close to you.
Julia wrote a post I've been waiting to read for a long time now. Quick and highly inadequate back story is that after much difficulty she and her husband had their completely awesome son, Patrick. They decided they wanted another child and proceeded through, I believe, 12 miscarriages to the recent pregnancy that resulted in newish babies, Caroline and Edward. Now go read the post about why they went through all that.
Our beloved M. Kennedy sort of accidentally wrote about her reasons for spaying and neutering all pets. I've never heard it put quite this way before and I don't know why because it makes complete sense. Also, as I've said before, Christ on a slab of bruschetta those dogs are cute!
Soon after the horrible earthquake in China Grace wrote about starting by saving oneself. Hers was the only post about the earthquake that I read. It really freaked me out on a lot of levels and she always writes very well about this sort of thing.
Last but not least for today is Katie. You remember Katie. She writes about what's happening to the kids from the polygamist compound now that the compound has been broken up. That whole situation makes my head spin. I believe that, as the saying goes, it takes a village to raise a kid but these kids had a village only it's highly possible that their village was causing them harm so what the hell?!!?! The larger village is going to have to cowboy up in a really big way.
I'm sure there will be more. The internet is generous like that. For my part I helped out some people in odd ways, fired up Auntie Blanche's community when she was in trouble (more info forthcoming) and spent an afternoon in the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens with Alita and her mom (photos forthcoming). Still working on it, one step at a time.
The other day my boss asked me and Audio Girl a question.
First you should remember that the gentlemen I work for are rich men. Without getting specific let's just say they're the kind of rich that includes multiple luxury homes and shared ownership of planes. I also want to stress that I like these guys and they're generally good folk, compassionate, intelligent and generous.
On to the question!
"Do you feel like the rising costs of energy are impacting your daily life?"
It seems as though he's just tumbling to the fact that the energy crisis is requiring a change in lifestyle for a lot of people. The ways in which it's going to impact him are sort of funny to me. For instance it's making travel to his other homes prohibitively expensive. And yet, at least he's noticing the impact, right? At least he's acknowledging that things are happening that we can't ever take back. He is, obviously, up on market trends and he said that the cost of fuel isn't going to go down. Not now, not ever. I'd already suspected this to be true but having it confirmed was somehow chilling.
Due to his position in life both financially and physically (he's of retirement age) he's less worried about how this will play out for himself but he's wondering what will happen for his kids and for me and Audio Girl who are only slightly older than his kids. Frankly, I'm worried too. I keep it at bay but when some rich dude starts to worry about it I get a little ramped up. I'm worried about how I'm going to manage this summer's heat or next winter's cold. I'm worried about the prices of other things going up. I'm super selfishly worried about whether I'll feel comfortable traveling next year for my birthday, something I really want to do and something I don't do much of. I'm worried about having trouble visiting New England for family and friend events.
Doesn't really matter what the specifics are, though, does it? If I'm worried it's going to niggle at me and keep me awake and give me nightmares and all the other classics.
Are you guys worried about this? What specifically? How are you handling it? Are you taking concrete measures to save energy and money? Are you sticking your head in the sand and if so do you have any tips for how to avoid having it unceremoniously yanked out by well-meaning inquisitive colleagues?
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
The Fluid Pudding Family had to say fare thee well to a good friend yesterday. Their cat, Luna, died under the strain of multiple complications.
As is the custom here at 117 Hudson, on hearing of a passing like this we dispense extra treats in honor of the dead. The pooch has had one of the gourmet pig's ears and, since dietary treats are out for them, the kittens were given a session with their new catnip bag. Please join us in toasting dear Luna. Remember that breathing, sitting, standing, sleeping, scratching, turning, snoring, walking, panting, the licking of private parts and the like are all treat-worthy accomplishments on a day like today.
Rest in peace, Luna, you are sorely missed.
Surely you've all seen this Engineer's Guide to Cats video that's been all over the internet, right? If you haven't go now. We'll wait.
It's just under 7 minutes well spent, I promise. You know how I feel about videos, too, so I don't say that lightly. Given my reticence about the online video craze I held out well into the fifth minute just saying in my head, "that's funny" without actually laughing.
Two words: cat yodeling.
Laughed until I cried.
I think that the ASPCA or Humane Society or someone should sponsor this to be part of the pre-show in movie theatres, it's a brilliant PSA. "Corporal Cuddling!" Come on? That's humane comedy gold!
No, I insist.
I think I'm ready to let go of something.
I know. Historic for me, isn't it?
You may be slightly less impressed to learn that this something is my online membership to Weight Watchers. I'll still be counting points to some extent. That will happen all my life I guess. You know, unless I decide to get fat again. However, I'm really ready to stop paying for the privilege of having someone else do the math for me. That's pretty huge, too. Usually I'd do anything to get out of doing my own math. Membership automatically renews on the 15th of the month so long about the 13th I'll be logging on and canceling before the next payment of $16.95 can be sucked out of my bank account.
Until that time I'm actually trying not to log in and fill in all the satisfying little boxes. I have it there as a backup and to easily look up the points values of anything I don't have memorized as yet. I have a paper handheld points calculator so I'll be able to do all this on my own when the time comes but for now it's easier to type in "baked beans" and have the grand old internet tell me what my choices are.
I'm not even nervous about it really. So far, though I've been testing my limits, I've stayed within a couple of pounds of the almighty goal. I do feel like marking the moment, though, so I thought I'd tell you all about it.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
1. Check out Laertes' cool pics of a trip to India. (Warning: There is one in there of big snakes but the rest are very cool so just be careful.)
2. Steph did a bit of a birthday tour of NYC.
3. Lester took some sweet shots of baby Lorry.
4. While you're over there check out Kath's recent posts and pictures about her trip to the Azores.
5. Pamie's kind of flickring/blogging (flogging? blickring?) from her office and it's fascinating.
6. M. Kennedy's bulldogs remain some of the most fun photo viewing on Flickr.
7. Heather makes this perplexing/mesmerizing composites.
8. It's a tiny bit odd but simultaneously kind of nice that we get real time announcements via the internet, isn't it?
9. Some of Photoreciprocity's photos have been reported to the Flickr powers as being "offensive" which is, I don't know, irksome? I'd go with arty.
10. Watch this space for the many, many photos I've taken over the past week. Have to do some editing first, though.
Life surprises you, doesn't it?
OK, this is not so much life as the internet but still, microcosm, right? The people at the locally famous Brooklyn web site Brownstoner somehow found my Flickr page and used one of my photos to spruce up a post. I thought I'd have to join the Brownstoner Flickr group to get one of my pics on their page but Hurray! for the Creative Commons license, right?
So that was a nice surprise. I like the nice ones.
Monday, May 26, 2008
I don't seem to have the words for a proper Memorial Day post but I do want to mark the day.
Thanks to last month's trip to our nation's capital I have a few appropriate images.
I thank everyone who has given of their time and skill and their lives for us.
I wish them all the safe homecoming, wherever that may be.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Feel free to voice your opinions in the comments. I'll just give you titles to make it easier.
Alternate Title: Homage to AB Chao
Friday, May 23, 2008
It's finally fucking halfway warm and getting warmer, yippee!
I am going to:
go to dance class
meet a new singing friend about singing
buy tickets to see a famous franchise action movie
do some work
meet friends to see the famous franchise action movie
hopefully meet Zelda and Chrome's mentor for dinner
come home and...uh...do stuff
I'll be taking pictures all along the way because it's warm and not raining for the first time in ages!
It's Steph's birthday today...or perhaps yesterday. It's today, right Steph? I always think it's the 22nd and it's in my birthday book as the 22nd but I have this memory of you telling me it was the 23rd and me being embarrassed but I can't prove it. Please help me!
Anyway, she's unemployed at the moment and interviewing diligently. The other day she had a pretty good one and they asked her to take a personality test. It turned out to be really weird and she's looking for some feedback. Will you go check out what she says about it and see what you think, please? Oh, you know, and leave her a comment to let her know what that thinking is too, also please.
You could wish her Happy Birthday, too.
You know, if you wanted.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
My hair stylist says I have the perfect hair for this cut.
I actually have the perfect body part for something that looks great on Katie Holmes and on me. This sort of thing never happens.
My hair is thin and fine and intensely cowlicky. Observe one of my many forehead cowlicks trying to break free below.
My stylist was amazing as usual and told me not to worry about the color and listened to all the concerns I had about hats and sun and scars and color maintenance. (Wow look how dirty my mirror is. Oops.)
Behold a blurry shot where I look like my mother's clone. OK, stop looking at that and check out my pretty new shirt.
She, the stylist not my mother, gave me simple instruction about how to treat it (I need to buy a flatiron, I've never had one) and how to blow it dry and even what to make sure of when I'm putting on my hats. I did bring her a Starbucks card which she loved but she gives me all the rest of that stuff even when I don't bring presents.
That's why I keep going back to her.
Updated photo of the post-stitch biopsy er, area? place? thingamajig? (Anyone else always thing of Fishamajigs every time they use that word?) If you're wondering, the other spots you can see (on each cheek and on my chin) are defects that aren't going to go away, one is a mole and 2 are...these other little red dot things I can't remember. Maybe broken capillaries, maybe rosacea and maybe those two things are exactly the same. Don't know.
Before Hair. Aren't you glad you're not my stylist?
Which is why I'm wearing it like this (crazy eyes expression optional) when it's not under a hat.
Are you having a good hair day today? Are you brave enough to show me?
I haven't had a hair cut or color since the week before Thanksgiving. I am the worst advertisement for my hair stylist, who I think is awesome, ever to walk the naked city. Pair this with the old scar on my forehead and the new one on my lip, none of which she will have seen until I peel off my hat tonight, and I'm thinking I might want to bring her gift. What's the appropriate gift to say thank-you-for-making-me-pretty-I'm-so-sorry-that-I-squandered-it? I'd like her to be in a really good mood when I ask her if she can suggest a lower cost way to color my hair in between colorings by her since I really can't afford to do it her way more than twice a year. Is that a rude thing to ask? God I hope not.
Anyway, got the stitch out yesterday which was awesome (OK, it hurt, the guy who took it out was a hack, but it's gone which is delightful and worth every second, no results as yet) and I always feel brilliant after a trip to the hair goddess so I'm looking forward to that as the capper to my day. I'm not doing anything this weekend that's especially fit for showing off my new look (half scarred half marvelously coiffed) so expect a fleet of photos in all my new hats.
Are you excited yet?
Where are you going?
Seriously, though, are you going anywhere for the long weekend? Tell me all about it, please!
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Do you guys use a feed reader to keep track of your reads out here on the intarweb? Chili turned me on to Google Reader (as I'm sure you've heard me say before because whoo! love!). Recently I developed a sort of rule or guideline or, OK, to be honest a self-inflicted habit. If a blog gets a gajillion readers and my little click won't make one bit of difference to either their stats or their ad revenue I read them entirely in the reader, I don't click through. Also, I truly appreciate it when blogs like that allow the full entry to be viewed in the reader. I'm not always reading on the quickest computers so loading some of the uber popular pages can take a while. However, if the person has a smaller readership and would notice if they lost my feeble click or two per day, especially if they're trying to create a little revenue for themselves, I make sure to click through even if it's so short an entry that I've accidentally read it already in the feeder while moving my mouse to click. It's sort of blogger communism, give according to your reader's abilities and take according to your computer's abilities.
Anyone else have self-imposed feed reader rules?
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
1. Little Seal. That dude is the happiest baby ever to (almost) walk the planet. Seriously, how many kids wake up from a nap and don't wig when an unfamiliar face goes in to get them up? Just the one, in my experience.
2. Alita. She's starting this new phase of grownupedness where she reads quietly while the grown ups talk and tells more intricate stories with more levels in her opinions. She's a miracle.
3. The Bean. She cracks me up with all the things she does that don't even register with her as unusual. She is extraordinary.
4. Punkin' Chili. She has a strength and surety about her that belies her thirst for knowledge and newness. She is the fire of her gorgeous hair color.
5. The Athlete. I have been so impressed with him this past month. Losing a grandparent is hard and weird and he was defying expectations at every turn. In a great way.
6. Blondie Girl. I will never forget her reaction to her first trip outside of the US. It fundamentally shifted her base and instead of resisting that sort of change the way a lot of us might she used it to spur her onward. She gets better every day.
7. Baby Weekly. He is a huge charmer. Even chock full of new immunizations he was a fabulous dinner companion and made me feel like the most beautiful girl in the room. I shudder to think how charming he'll be once he actually learns to talk.
8. Music Baby. I feel this affinity with him because he travels a lot with his parents' artistic work and I used to do a lot of that, too. He's a ham and a mimic and endlessly creative and he's only TWO for cripes sake. I haven't seen him a long while and I miss him.
9. ProfBoy. I haven't even met the kid yet but I'm going to. (ProfDoc: I got confirmation that it's the 14th, we can make proper plans now.) I'm really looking forward to spending a day with him and seeing him in action.
10. Anonymous Suburban 7 year old. I just re-read that story the other day and it still boggles my mind.
You guys are fabulous commenters by the way. If you haven't subscribed to the comments feed and had a question or observation hanging over the past 4 days or so you can check back now. I just spent a few minutes checking back in on the posts since Friday.
Thanks for all your thoughts!
1. I love driving but I don't mind that I don't drive very often.
2. If money were no object one of my dreams is to take a race car driving course, or better yet a stunt driving one.
3. Despite being a good driver and loving to drive fast I am not a big lane changer or merger. I need plenty of room to pull over into a new lane.
4. Stick is better than automatic. It's a skill everyone should have.
5. I can't park for shit and am continually embarrassed by it. When I was 16 or so the hotel parking lot at work was very crowded. ChemE was driving her car and she was worried about parking. I reacted badly to her worry and said I'd park in the one tight space left. I fucked it up and scraped the car next to us. It was horribly embarrassing and I still hate that I did it.
6. The first time I was ever summoned to a police station was because I tapped another car in a parking lot at the mall and didn't leave a note. There was no damage to either car and I was young and ignorant and it never occurred to me to leave a note. (It was the sort of tap that happens every day in a place where there is a lot of parallel parking and no one ever reports it because if they did there wouldn't be time for anything else.) Some busybody watching took down my plate and left a note on the car and I had to go to the police station and get a lecture. That's right, they called me in just to lecture me not to give me a ticket or anything, couldn't do that over the phone.
7. My first traffic ticket was because I pulled out in front of a cop and Chili was in the car with me. She threw attitude at the cop so he ticketed me. It was a classic moment in our friendship and it spurred me to get my first job since I didn't think it would be a good idea to ask my parents for money to pay for a ticket that was, in all honesty, my fault.
8. The most expensive ticket I ever got was $237 for going 83 in a 55 in CT. I wasn't paying attention and I love to drive fast. This is a deadly combination in CT.
9. The biggest vehicle I've ever driven was a 24 foot box van for a freelance job I was doing in NYC after I got back from London.
10. Had to take my driving test twice. I failed the written. You've never seen my mother so pissed.
Monday, May 19, 2008
Yesterday I saw a beautiful movie that could be perfect for the 117 Hudson Sustainability Awards. It's all about learning to love the people around you and to open your heart despite what your head is telling you. You never know what you might get and even if it hurts it will have been worth it.
The movie is called The Visitor and it's pretty seriously indie so I don't know how widespread the release has been. Do your best to search it out, though, preferably in theatres for the good of the filmmakers but if not then the DVD release is good, too. Take your time to savor this smooth, rich delicacy.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
For the first time maybe ever I'm blogging from a home desk. I've had this gorgeous antique desk that belonged to my grandmother and it's been in my bedroom waiting for me to put it to use. OK, to be painfully honest I've been using it but I really don't think that using it as a flat file does it justice. There's even space in front of the computer where I could write cards, letters, the great American novel if need be. I so freaking need to do that last one. I'm working on it. Every day I'm a little closer to completion. I think this desk will be a help. Just like Gert's!
Tonight I moved the desktop computer I inherited from work into the bedroom and onto the desk, I put some Avatar into the DVD player in Pony Express' TV that's been in there unused for so long and I set to work running cables and plugging in new surge protectors and generally improving my lot in life.
The strange unintended consequence of this is that I've essentially fixed it up so I can live entirely in my bedroom with internet, TV, bed and all close to the bathroom. I have to leave to get cable & network TV (as opposed to DVDs) and the kitchen. So, I bought this apartment as a nice way to expand from my previous one room studio and now I've turned it back into two studios. Perhaps I'll need rental income and this is a way to see how I can achieve that. Perhaps I simply can't stand to be more than 2 steps away from my stories both on TV and the intarwebs.
Anyway, I got something accomplished today and I felt like sharing. Hope you got something accomplished today. Feel free to share if you're so moved.
When I first thought about doing sustainability posts two names came to mind; Auntie Blanche in the human category and Frank in the dog category. I have trouble understanding people who don't want and enjoy pets. One of the many reasons is that if you don't love pets you're going to miss out on meeting a dog like Frank and that is a tragedy.
Frankie was a mix; surely some newf in there, probably some lab and maybe some other sort of retriever. He was owned by a man who, I believe, went to jail leaving the dog in the apartment he shared with his girlfriend. The girlfriend didn't like him so she turned him out of the house. Frank stayed there, next to the door of the building, waiting while the people he cared for wandered in and out completely ignoring him. Neighbors fed him for six months before they took him to a groomer then took him in while they searched for a more permanent place for him to stay.
At that point he went to live with Carmencita and Carsick where he showed his true colors. He was simply faithful, kind and true. When someone he loved (especially Carsick) came back after an absence he gave a crazy rooing noise that sounded exactly like Chewbacca. Late in life, when he struggled to rise on his own, there was someone creepy hanging out around their house. Frank stationed himself asleep by the front door, which was see-through. When the person got too close Frank raised his big head into sight and gave a couple of his deep and rich but rare barks.
I was lucky that Frank loved me as much as I loved him. We spent a lot of time together and sometimes if I'd been gone too long I'd even merit the wookie noise, which was pretty much his highest compliment. One night I was invited over to watch some basketball playoff action. The family was upstairs in the parlor so I entered on the lower level and went up. Frank was asleep. I sat down and we watched and talked for about ten minutes before Frank woke up. The next words I spoke made him bark his intruder alert unceasingly while he worked to gain his feet. No amount of verbal reassurance would soothe him as he stalked toward me on unsteady, old man legs. About halfway across the room he must have recognized my voice or scent and realized it was me. Have you ever seen an embarrassed dog? It's hilarious! He shuffled toward me, abashed, and gave me a strong newfie leaning hug. Poor dog, we could not stop laughing.
A combination of arthritis, fused spinal discs and degenerative nerve disease lowered Frankie's quality of life in later days. He was a trooper, though, and, like Emily, was always willing to do whatever kept him closest to his people even when it hurt. One day I was crossing a relatively busy street and I misjudged the traffic in relation to Frank's slowed gait and was urging him across with leash and voice, afraid that he might get hit. A woman was crossing the sidewalk toward which we were headed and she was staring at us. As we got close she pointed a slightly panicked finger and said, "Uh...his collar, his collar!" As he gained the curb I looked to see that, in my excitement, I'd pulled his well worn leather collar up over one ear. I thanked the woman, adjusted the collar then apologized to Frankie. While I did I was thinking, "Lady, if this dog suddenly rose up, yanked off his collar and chased you down the boulevard I'd give him a whole sleeve of Lorna Doones and the world's longest tummy rub I'd be so happy he was better." But he didn't and we continued on our way.
In the end Frank died on April 13, 2001. I went over to dye some Easter eggs on the 12th and Frank stayed on the floor in the office all night. Near the end of the evening Carsick told me that the previous day they'd made the decision that Frank's bad days were nearly constant so they'd made an appointment for the 13th for the visiting vet to give him a compassionate end. That morning Frank had woken up in the kitchen, not been interested in eating, walked into the office favoring one side in a way that indicated a probable stroke, then laid down on the floor and he hadn't moved since. I feel as though he let them know, in as clear terms as he could, that their decision was the right one at the right time. A kind dog is what I'm saying, so kind.
I've been reading a lot about atheism lately. It's certainly got logic on its side and I want to be able to commit myself to it but little things still bother me about it. One of those things is a picture that I can't shake that, when it's our time and we're waiting, confused outside the door of our home, it will be Frank who takes us in and feeds us Lorna Doones and rubs our tummies until we feel comfortable again.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
I want to point out a comment on the last post. Katie, the author of one of the posts that was irking me, wrote a masterful comment, especially in light of our recent conversations about argument/debate. She started off with one brief thing that managed to say, "FYI, I'm reading and I have thoughts about you too" then followed it up with a question about another, much less controversial, post which lent the entire exchange an air of non-combative conversation. It was the sort of thing that the internet could use more of since we're all staking out our own spaces for our opinions but still want to share.
The thumbs down is for me. Way back when I said that I wasn't going to dignify these BP spikes with posts. Instead I was going to write more about my ideas about sustainability. The extreme anger I'm still feeling about a number of other things helped me to forget that promise. Whoops. Look for more sustainability posts and (slightly) less ranting.
On the sustainability topic, Miflohny and I had a good day of it today. She belongs to a famous-in-Brooklyn food co-op and every couple of months they have a clothing swap. I don't know if it's open to the public or if I get to go because she invites me but I've been once a year for the past couple of years and it's a great thing. Any participant can bring up to 15 items and choose whatever they like to take home. You can go throughout the day so there are always new people and new items coming in. Miflohny and I usually do a pre-swap with each other's items, too, which is fun. I put in the full 15 items and took out only 3 or 4 which was just the way I wanted it to be. When I combed through my closets for my 15 items I found way more than 15 so I'm also ready to do a Salvation Army/Good Will/Wherever run very soon, something I've needed to do for a long time. I am unreasonably proud of myself for this.
She also had a head's up on a big stoop sale benefiting a local charity (can't remember which one or I'd link, sorry, perhaps Miflohny will in the comments) so we wandered over there checking out other sales along the way. I came away with a beautiful vintage cloche hat for only $2! You'll see pictures of it soon. I've been looking for a good cloche for ages.
Feeling pretty good about my sustainability efforts today. Which is a good thing because next up is water conservation, the city just raised water rates over 11%.
You guys know me, right? I read even the subject of the post and my blood pressure went up so high that my whole body became red.*
I didn't comment, though. Her space, her choice, MY OXYGEN, ALITA'S WATER, LITTLE SEAL'S FOSSIL FUEL!!!!!!
I feel like the entirety of the human race has decided to model itself after lemmings. I want to rant about this and SUVs and natural disasters and the current election and...
You know what, clearly nobody cares and I'm too wildly irrational to make sense. Gonna go walk the dog and get ready to go to the clothing swap. That's sustainable and pleasant, right? Perhaps I'll get some sun and GET MORE CANCER AND DIE NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY I HAVE THE SCARRING TO PROVE IT!!!!!
Huh, OK, so not calming me down. Who'd have guessed?
Have a cool, calm and collected Saturday y'all. I think I'm gonna need a drink.
*In case it's not clear the author of the post already has 4 kids.
Friday, May 16, 2008
I've got a full day but not particularly strenuous, which is probably good given what I ended up doing today. Here are some pretty little blue flowers that I love and saw on my trip to DC for you to look at while I go to floor barre, see a movie with a friend and see a play with another one. I should be chock full of culture by Saturday.
What are you full of?
Thursday, May 15, 2008
The photos from my trip to DC are finally processed and posted. You can see the whole set here.
The ones I'm posting here are my favorites, which I bet won't surprise you. Not pictured are 2 guys seated on the sidewalk on either side of where I was standing when these were taken. They were both in their twenties with a bit of a hipster vibe to them. On my right one guy was reading a novel, something painfully trendy no doubt, and he was simply slathered in tattoos. To the left the guy was reading a series of comic books.
This little gem of a butterfly was not interested in interaction. Pony Express got no reaction when she complimented the elaborate face paint and pointed out the glitter of the eyelids and lips. No, this one was a girl after my own heart, an observer. She was mesmerized by these two guys and what they were doing and she seemed to want to jump into their skin so she set about learning by doing. She studied them then she sussed out some reading material and then came the beauty part, she started to walk the walk.
I found her mesmerizing.
It's a good thing that I got all gussied up yesterday and posted those pictures. It is a far better thing that you guys are all "Woot! Lorelei Gilmore! Yippee!" I appreciate that so much.
Even more today.
I always feel like you're really supposed to try your hardest to be honest with doctors. Even if it's embarrassing, do what you can. Am I wrong? Maybe this is why I have so much trouble watching House. So, today at the dermatologist the question was, "What are you here for today?" and I answered, "I'm here for her to look at the spot on my lip where I've been using A1dera, to check in on the scar on my forehead and to just check the spots on my back where she removed moles since they're hard for me to see." Then, well then chickadees, I took it a step further.
The pretty young doc came in and she determined that I'd be best off with a punch biopsy of the lip (sad clown, but necessary and expected) and saw three more spots on my back that she wanted to take off when I was ready (the hell?). I am of the opinion that you're best off to just take the big hit early rather than eke it all out so I opted for "Now! Right now!" and then I remembered something. Stop reading now if you can't take a little Salacious with your lunch. Right at the top edge of my right nipple is a small spot (mole? bump? alien probe?) with a couple of different colors in it and it never grows or changes but it's kind of ugly so I took that giant step further and said, "Is this anything?"
She's so delightfully light about everything. She looked carefully and said, "Oh, that's just a wart." A wart?! On my nipple!?! Auuuuuugh! "We can freeze it off but, I gotta warn you, it hurts." I'm sorry, the point at which you tell me I have a wart on my nipple is the point at which I want it off as fast as possible even if it takes a team of archaeologists and a script by Michael Motherfucking Cricton!
To sum up, yesterday: pretty pink dress, hot hot boots, feeling like a million bucks that Josh Jackson just tucked in his pocket. Today: Three shaved mole boo boos to go with my other three scars, a stitch in my lip (pictured) to go with the scar on my forehead and a frozen boob wart (no, I'm not going to post a picture of it, not even if you beg, I'm serious).
Like the title says, Sexay.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
ProfDoc requested a picture of my new dress. I can't seem to choose just one.
Here it is with all my weather appropriate accoutrements (dog tail optional).
Yeah, when you take pictures at my house things happen. Dogs investigate your hand, clutter is everywhere and I don't bother to clean it up...
OK enlarge this picture and tell me the truth, the divot is obvious. Sure you may not notice it first thing but it's a thing no matter how you slice it, it's undeniable. Don't try to bullshit me.
Somehow I became intent on walking you through all the permutations of my outfit throughout the day. This is what I wore inside the office today. While wolfing down free food. So much free food. You could roll me off the couch and into my bed.
Aaaaaand now with oddly stilted shoulder posing.
I'm cool, I'm casual, I still have freaky model arm going on. Also I'm making the dress all askew with that shit. I think it might be a consequence of vigorous in sucking of the gut.
Sometimes I don't aim well. My dog is super cute, though, don't you think? Is she cute enough to distract you from the way I apply my makeup in the mirror above a computer in the living room? I thought not.
I'm gonna call this the most accurate representation of the dress. Do you like it? I bought it because it makes me feel all "Lorelei Gilmore wants to be you!" I hope it's closer to that than to, "Ma'am, don't make us enforce the age limit on magenta again."
Now with snooty nose and focus on the knee and just one of my dog's highly attentive eyes. Please don't be intimidated by my talent.
I'm wearing my new dress but there's no way for Photobooth to capture it properly in this office so I'll take proper shots at home later. In the meantime...
Speaking of fish...or not, really. Today has been a yummy food day. I brought all kinds of good-for-me food in preparation for meeting Steph (by linking to her am I trying to guilt her into posting more often? you be the judge) for Tasti D and I ate a fair amount of it before the lovely ladies of the office here announced that they were holding an audition for a caterer and we were all invited. My mother would be proud, I had a little bit of everything. OK not everything. I passed on the mushrooms and the chicken mostly in favor of shrimp. The 2 things I could have eaten until I passed out were the penne a la vodka (I know, I'm common, sue me) and this crazy organic rice salad with sweet potatoes and purple rice! So delicious. The shrimp was fine, I'm sure the sandwiches were also fine, the blue cheese/grape/fig/sugared nuts salad was also quite good, the spring rolls could have done nicely as a coating for the entire inside of my body and I didn't even get to the desserts since I was going for fro yo.
It's OK, there are leftovers, lots of them, and we've been given permission, nay been encouraged, to pilfer. I'm so on that.
The thing is that it gave me kind of an epiphany, no more accurately a revelation, about what has made this whole weight loss thing work for me. I eat food that tastes good, fine even, but I stay away from food that tasted GREAT! If it tastes GREAT! I'll just eat more so I stick to the blandy middle of the road stuff. Sure, I've learned that I like brussels sprouts and that's cool but if there were a UFC match between my home cooked brussels sprouts and a plate full of that penne a la vodka you'd for sure be taking the sprouts home in a body bag.
On the one hand, knowledge is power, so I can keep using this technique to my advantage. On the other hand, how very sad is that?
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
From the ginormous list of things squirelled away in the "Star" File of my Google Reader.
1. The first item on this list is one of my favorite places in the 'hood. For most of the years I've lived here it's been a working church. I have no idea what happened to the congregation and now it's going to be condos. Condos I could never in a quadrillion years afford.
2. As she often does, Chookooloonks is kicking my ass with something to think about. That's a lot of courage being asked of us, isn't it? Makes me want to try, though.
3. It never hurts to be reminded, does it? I might have to buy one of these and hang it somewhere prominent in my life.
4. Here's a link to a link of an interview about how one's blog can be group therapy. Pertinent, no?
5. I am a hopeless gardener. I think it's a waste of time and stupid and I am pathologically unable to keep anything alive in my current apartment. And yet, every so often I think that I really should have plants in my apartment or they'll revoke my Adulthood Card. These pots brought on another one of those thoughts. Should I try again or make peace with this part of myself?
6. I love Flea. She's awesome. She posted a rant about people who want to dismantle the public school system and she makes really good points that I didn't even realize needed to be made. People think we should do away with public school? For real? Oh for the love of all that is chocolate how does this shit happen in America? At one point, admittedly long ago and far away, weren't we better than that?
7. This one is proof that I'm not the only one questioning whether parents-to-be are really thinking about environmental impact.
8. Anybody want to go to a ranch for a shot at hooking up with a real, live cowboy? Ree is going to be running a home grown version of a reality show featuring her Cousin T. in the role of Real Live Cowboy. In a later post she mentioned having to keep a careful eye out for water moccasins while taking photos on the ranch so I will not be participating but I would truly love it if one of you would. I do enjoy the vicarious living.
9. I am on the fence about getting a subscription to Fray. They really need subscribers but they rejected my story. This is not a good enough reason not to subscribe. I know this. But I'm having trouble pulling the trigger. Do you want to subscribe? Tell me if you do because maybe then I'll just be able to slide down that slippery slope with you.
10. Scalzi linked to a great article in Esquire about the process of bringing home the US dead from the war in the Middle East. The process of death is one that I've always been fascinated with. Not sure why, perhaps when you have trouble letting go of stuff, like I do, the ultimate letting go draws your eye. Among the many things discussed are the shortage of buglers, something I witnessed in real life not two weeks after reading the article. Not sure how long it's going to be up on Esquire's site so you should hop on over and read it. I know it's long. It's worth it. Make the time.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Today is one of those days when living in a city is...challenging.
Fine night's sleep, fine morning, fine shower, fine breakfast, fine dog walk, fine commute. But, you see, it's windy out. Apparently quite windy once you get up high enough. I am up high enough since I work on the 31st floor. The smart people who build skyscrapers have figured out (one assumes with a process of trial and error that makes my blood run cold) that it's better, in a windy situation, to have a building that bends rather than breaks. On a normal day this is all behind the scenes magic that a particularly nervous person can shut her mind to. On a windy day, though, there's the creaking. You can hear the building swaying in the breeze. You know the sound effects that are used in a movie when people are on a ship crossing the sea at night? That's what my office sounds like. I try to keep my mind on the logic of it with a mental picture of Charlie Eppes to soothe my anxiety.
On days like today I'd really just like to go home. Or pack a bottle of Jack with my lunch.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
First a question. I've always called it "Mother's Day" but I realized today that it should be "Mothers' Day" perhaps. Which do you prefer?
Given that's my big thought for the day here's something more profound from someone more motherly:
"Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired."
- Mother Theresa