Monday, January 19, 2009

Sweet Prompt Sixteen

Here's the next PROMPTuesday. She told us to write a complaint letter. Fortunately I'd been writing one in my head for 2 days.

Dear L Word Ladies,

I don’t think I could have hated the season finale of Season 5 any more if you had animated a bunch of bananas rapping a geometry proof. Oh my god the suck was so complete. No, I don’t understand why Shane is besties with Intolerable Jenny (IJ) but she is. I didn’t make it that way, you did! So to have Shane drown her sorrows in someone IJ loves is unworthy of the character. Good GOD women, you have no loyalty to plot or to language or to timeline at least have some loyalty to the characters your audience is devoted to. Shane brings you the straight girls because straight girls think she’s delicious (I don’t understand why I just know it to be true) and she brings you the lesbian girls because they so love to hate her because she’s getting all the girls they wish they had. Do not randomly kneecap such a lucrative character! I know I’m an Alice, I know I’m not getting a Shane, like, ever but I can still love her from afar and this whole setting her up to knock her down thing over and over is deeply, deeply dissatisfying. Cut it out.

I want a do over and I want it now. Go away and come back in Season 6 (which I realize is over, I’m watching on DVD, I can’t afford Showtime) and make it all better. As apology I will take a swift and gory death for IJ. Seriously, if 6 is your last season then let’s give the audience what they really want.

Love (for Shane!)


  1. wow.
    now I want to watch that show.
    I may never get over the 'bananas rapping a geometry proof'

    your brain is brilliant.

  2. See! Shane is a whore! Who does that to their best friend?!! Even if said best friend is IJ!

    Shouldn't I be the one straight girls find to be delicious? Especially you! I can't even believe you would pick that whore over me!

    BTW, the 1st episode of season 6 is free on I watched it yesterday morning. Still haven't made it through season 5 but whatever.