Tuesday, December 03, 2013

Better Out Than In

ColdReading a friend's blog post I suddenly realized that I wasn't absorbing the words. I'd gone to a different place. It happened to be the place where someone said what feels like the worst thing ever said about me. I'm still not entirely sure why it was the worst but I know it must be the element of truth it contained.

A little later I was reading this post that was specifically geared toward Thanksgiving and that thing someone said about me came up again. It wasn't said on a holiday or by a family member but it had that same edge and certainly the longevity of one of those horrible family things that only scabs, never heals. I encourage you to read both of those posts and to remember that we might be on either side of the table in the latter. Then I hope you'll share the worst thing ever said about you (no attribution necessary) because, as many a grandmother has noted, better out than in.

"I'm not like that. I'm not made to be alone like you are."


  1. people truly can be awful...and frequently, i think it's without realizing what, exactly, they're saying.

    "there's something seriously wrong with bisexual people. they all belong in a mental institution." - said minutes after i came out to a group of people.

  2. The fact that they don't realize it makes me even angrier, you know? Ignorance in these cases is no excuse.

    1. i agree completely. it's a result from not thinking before speaking/typing.

      sometimes i wish the act writing real letters by hand was a thing again. maybe it would force people to slow down and think.

  3. Miflohny2:29 PM

    This is probably not the worst thing. But I tend to more easily forget things said by people that are not important in my life - what they way doesn't matter.

    "Remind you of someone?"

    Said to me, by someone I love, about a younger family member who was not behaving (in the speaker's eyes) in a good way. The "correct" answer was that it reminded the speaker of me. I had an answer, but it wasn't that answer. Which only underscored how little the speaker sometimes understands who I was and who I am (and who other family members were).

    Try not to let the stupid, crazy talk get to you, and I'll do the same. (Easier said than done.)

  4. Yelled from across the street, "Moo cow! Hey fat pig!" This came from both adults and kids at what I assume was either a family reunion or a graduation celebration. Still haunts me to this day.