Thief

Rosie O'Donnell tells a story of her first night of stand up. She didn't understand that comics wrote their own material and that it was a big deal to steal someone else's so she did a Steve Martin routine. After her set, which killed by the way, another comic came up and told her how that wasn't cool. At all. But she'd done so well that she was hooked and they'd asked her back so then she had to write her first material ever.

I already know that it's uncool to steal material..in public...for profit.

So, like here, I don't steal, I quote. In normal conversation, though? There is the occasional grand theft hilarity.

In a conversation with a small group the other day I said, "I kind of half-assed joined Weight Watchers* this week and starting tomorrow I'm going to join whole-assed." Huge laugh, very gratifying, everyone thought I was delightfully witty. I loved that! I felt a little guilty but it was a friendly conversation so I couldn't exactly go back and correct the mistake.

Here, however, I can confess freely. That's totally a joke from Mad About You. Paul & Jamie are talking about whether they're going to have a baby and Jamie says they've been going about it half-assed. Paul asks what she means by that. Jamie says, "I mean I want to go at it whole-assed!" This precedes her line, "Oh my god I'm going to be the mommy!" Great episode.

Thanks for hearing my confession.

*Yes, I did. Whole different post.