Sunday, June 10, 2007

Getting a Win

This afternoon I walked over to BAX to see some trimester-end student performances. This was Alita's first class session at BAX and she was great. There were no photos allowed during the performance but they gave us a photo op at the end of the show. Sadly this was the only shot I got before the batteries in my camera gave up.

I didn't need a camera to see how well she did, though. She had fun and she had clearly learned great things and was, as usual, just beautiful.

Right now I'm watching the Tony Awards on a time delay thanks to the glorious technology of the DVR.

It's kind of killing me.

I'm so happy for everyone, there are a number of people connected with these plays that I know in one way or another and for them I am so happy but I can't really stop tearing up. I don't feel successful and I feel as though I have been undermotivated (I know I have been) and I've let me hold myself back. I've been very discouraged of late and...distracted is such a terrible way to refer to it...but distracted by a number of emotional things in the rest of life. (In case you haven't noticed, 2007 has sucked the proverbial eggs.)

As I said to Alex last night, I need a win, people. I need it badly.

Not sure how I'm going to get it but I believe I'm now being inspired to figure that out.

In the meantime it was good to go to see Alita get one of her first big wins. As we walked to our celebratory pizza lunch we had the following conversation:

Me: What was your favorite part of performing today? (Up until now she'd only talked about the things she loved about the other performances in the show.)

Her: Um, well, I liked the....I don't know!

Me: You can't choose?

Her: Nope.

Me: Was there anything you didn't like about performing?

Her: (Immediately) Nothing!

That's my girl.


  1. I thought about you when I was driving home from work yesterday morning, listening to NPR do a piece about the Tonys.

    I know this is all about you and what YOU need. It should go without saying, but I'm going to say it again; if there's anything I can do to help - ANYTHING - just say the word.

    I love you


  2. I get the Tony thing....I cried for 3 hours last night...then I busted out my Shakespeare monologue (and was brilliant)...then I cried some more.
    I get it.

  3. Anonymous5:57 PM

    Inspiration sometimes kicks us in the head! Sparks that move us in a forward momentum are often unfortunately a constant low-level irritation until it's something we address just to shut the damn thing up. My husband like to joke that I won't move out of any stagnant place unless I get a cattle prod in the ass.