Notes From The Precipice

Dear Delightfully Kind & Hard-working Amish Man at the Green Market,

These pickles are possibly the best bread & butter pickles I have ever had the pleasure of devouring. I have eaten a quarter of them straight out of the jar with a fork. I'm afraid I might not be able to stop scarfing them down before I make myself sick. I'm sort of OK with that, they're that good.

Thank you so very much for this deliciousness,
Kizz

Dear USA Today Olympic Programmers,

Give a girl a warning when you make this big production of playing up the broadcast of the semi-final heat with the sweet young swimmer with ball cancer. If I'd known he was going to lose I would have left for work instead of standing around getting my heart broken.

Geez,
Kizz

Dear Favorite Kid in My Apartment Complex,

This evening you stood in the entryway and held open both the inner and outer doors for me with your Phelpsian wingspan. It broke your heart not to be able to pet the dog while you did it, too. You are kind and intelligent and bright and aware and you give me hope for the world and the future.

Keep that shit up,
Kizz

Dear Bob Costas,

Is that a toupe?

No judgments,
Kizz

Dear Kitchen,

Please clean yourself up, you stink. While you're at it cook all the stupid effortful food I just bought.

Love & chocolate,
Kizz

Dear Universe,

Quit it with the pleasant feeling of well-being today. It's freaking me out and making me afraid to answer my phone.

Kizz

Dear Readers,

You're pretty and you smell nice.

Now get back to watching the Olympics.

xoxox
Kizz