Sunday, April 11, 2010

My Friend Titled A Song Once

It's been a long week. I've worn makeup for 6 days straight, very unusual for me. Also have had an alcoholic drink at least once per day for 6 days. That, too, is relatively unusual for me. Not sure whether I want to call either of them a trend.

The reason for my trip was that Nanny, Queen Bee's mother, died. The Bees are family to me. Losing Nanny, while expected on some level, was hard. With the timing of the trip and the amount of stuff that needed to be done and what's going on back here I never really found a moment to be able to truly mark her passing in feeling. (That's a fancy way of saying I haven't much cried yet.)

Usually my brain and my soul prefer space between things. I like to have one day per week where I truly don't have to do anything. This sounds wildly luxurious to most, I know, but it keeps me sane and (I'm willing to bet) off meds so I try to do it. I've been flat out since last Tuesday morning, somethings to do and someones to spend time with every day. The outings have been wonderful, no question, if I hadn't really wanted to go on them I would have stayed home. Heaven knows I had a good excuse.

Getting up today and getting myself together to go to brunch, though, was slow going. The weather is spring-like (read: impossible to count on) so I couldn't trust what I wanted to wear. I was cold last night and stranded waiting for the bus. We were brunching down by the water. I wound up in a t-shirt with a cardigan Queen Bee knit me and a jacket. Most of the day I was wildly over-dressed. Standing at the mirror to do my makeup I got a whiff of something off the sweater. I leaned down and took a deeper sniff of one chest panel and it smelled exactly like Nanny's house. Nanny hasn't lived in her house for almost a decade and Joe the Barber has been gone from it just over two years. Someone else entirely lives there now. That smell is, as they say, in the wind. I sniffed the other side of the cardie and it was just as good. With that behind me I could get ready and head out.

We had a lovely day. Pony Express and I arrived early and sat watching hoards of children chuck rocks into the river. Then our group of 8, some expected and some not, just the way I like it, sat down to a delicious meal. We took photos in a photobooth. Then we walked to the new park and checked it out. Despite a long line we persevered for the sake of ice cream and sat in that golden late afternoon sunlight eating our dairy delights. A long walk later found me at the bus and home again.

I smelled my sweater just before I left the house, not 10 minutes after I'd first gotten a wind of Nanny's house. It just smelled like me. For just a moment, though, she was here and thank goodness.

1 comment:

  1. That's some beautiful writing there, Kizz. I'm a little teary-eyed! Isn't it amazing how smells can bring you such strong memories?