Now, M (the mom) turned 50 this past weekend. She was able to celebrate with two of her best and longest time friends. One of these funny ladies gave her the gift of a complete roller derby outfit. It involves short shorts over hot pants, Hanson brothers glasses, a derby name and a signature move. It's serious.
Listening to the description of this epic gift M (daughter #1) and I locked eyes across the brunch table. "OK, we need to step up our game." she whispered intently. And she's right.
I've got a short schoolgirl kind of kilt and some leggings. I think my Blundstones will come in handy. Surely I can cobble together some kind of top for this outfit. I don't have a derby name, though. I can't come up with anything. So, like, Pamie is officially May Q. Holla when she's on the track. Who should I be? Kizz My Ass doesn't quite work as a name, it's more of just a directive. Although I guess Kizz Ass could be a name but it's not terribly formidable.
I need your help. I want to put my derby name on my shirt (or possibly my spanx so if you want to know my name I have to flip up my skirt - bonus, if we're writing it on my ass we've got plenty of room). Please find me a derby name! I want to be fierce but funny. I want to be stern but saucy. Elegant and eloquent, you get that, right? Discussion will continue in the comments, see you there!
Posts
Wait, are you actually skating with a team, then?
ReplyDeleteOh no no no, we just intend to be extremely committed bleacher creatures. I could barely skate around a track on my own much less with a team of well-toned, rabid athletes trying to mow me down.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, but I don't think you get a derby name unless you skate. Seems reasonable, no, Kizz-a-deth?
ReplyDeleteI have no idea. Maybe Kizz Kilz? We heard an announcement for Roller Girl try outs here. I was seriously tempted. Then Chris reminded that I have this second job of teaching yoga.
ReplyDeleteYou do know that K&A's neighbor (your fellow cat-care helper) is a roller-derby goddess, yes??
ReplyDeleteI did not know this. Had no idea at all! I wonder if she'll be playing on the 9th.
ReplyDeleteI might be going to that bout!
ReplyDeleteMrs. Witter
ReplyDeleteVeronica Marz
Ginny Wolfe
January Ninth
Sorry... it's been a long week...
http://www.babyhold.com/babynames/Ideas/100_Roller_Derby_Names_Rollergirl/
ReplyDeleteFor Inspiration.
Godda Kizz
I watch entirely too much television, but my favorite name so far has been Erin Sockabitch. For you, you go with Kizz Myazz, Raisa Welt, Kimona Wannashankya, Sister Mary Stomp, and just plain old Spike.
ReplyDeleteI think I would be Talulah Bashhead.
ReplyDeleteI do like Kizz My Ass. I say go for it, even though Baly is correct. I recently heard an NPR story on a men's roller derby team. All the hopeful members who had been training with the team for awhile, but had not yet been picked for the team, were not allowed to use roller derby names. I think they were just all called "recruit" or "potential" or something boring like that.
ReplyDeleteThere's a national registry of derby names so it makes sense that people who are or plan to be in the league can't register their names until it's certain they'll be a member. For those of us just having fun I don't think it matters all that much what we put on our costumes.
ReplyDeleteDid you know there's a registry for clown faces, too? No two alike.
ReplyDeleteAs a matter of fact I did. That's what happens when you let a girl become a mime too young.
ReplyDeleteAh, yes. Yes, of course.
ReplyDeletenike shoes
ReplyDeleteyeezy wave runner 700
yeezy boost 350
adidas yeezy
moncler
christian louboutin shoes
nike air max
moncler jackets
moncler outlet
vans shoes
spongebob kyrie 5
xiaofang20191130