Thursday, December 02, 2010

Not The Burger Joint

A few weeks ago the dog graduated to being out of his crate at night. It was not a surprise that he slept in the bed from night one nor that he sleeps right up against me at all times regardless of the great tracts of bed available to him. When they have to amputate my right arm at least we'll know why. Last night, though, was the first time he slept under the covers. I'd shown him before but he'd never seemed interested. I have no photos of this since I was basically asleep at the time so you'll have to use your imagination.

Eddie: Hey, what's under there?

Kizz: It's under the covers. I've shown you this before.

E: I don't remember that. Show me again.

K: See for yourself, it's under the covers, no big thang.

E: Oh, it's cozy in here. Warm and I can get closer to you. Don't have to hear the crazy world out there or see the cats sneaking around. I can just relax. I like it down here. If you'd just shove over a little closer to the edge of the bed, that's it, I think I can make a go of this. Yup, just one more turn around and, yeeeeeah. That's the stuff.

K: OK?

E: Yeeeeeah.

K: OK, g'night.

An indeterminate but short time later...

E: It's stuffy under here.

K: Then get out. Shhh, I'm sleeping.

E: I'm uncomfortable.

K: I know. Just get out.

E: Where is out?

K: Exactly where in was. Now shh. Sleeping.

E: I can't find it.

K: Tough then. Stay where you are.

E: I can't find out.

K: Yes you can.

E: No I can't.

K: Yes. You can. You got in, you can get out.

E: You showed me in.

K: And it's the same as out so you already know where it is.

E: Do not.

K: Do so...gah! OK, here is out, just get out. Out out out.

E: Aaahhhhh, sweet out air. Nice.


E: So you're going to sleep right there?

K: I am sleeping right there.

E: You gonna stay there?

K: I was planning on it.

E: If you just scooched around a leeeeetle bit I could...

K: Oh for the love of half chewed rawhide, here, I'll move, now go to sleep.

E: Will do, just a couple more turns around, there move that arm, nice, yeeeeeah, that's the stuff.

An indeterminate but only slightly longer time later.

E: It's kind of chilly out here.

K: I know, crazy weather this week.

E: I'm a little chilly. Think I just got a goose pimple.

K: Under the covers?

E: Yes please.

K: Hurry up.

E: Done.

K: Sleep.

E: Could you just...

K: There. Done. Sleep.

E: G'night.

Some time later, I'm totally not sure when because cute does not make up for lost rest.

E: Out. Uncomfy. Need out.

K: Dude. What the fuck?

E: Sleepy. Let me out.

K: Here. Out.

E: Thank you. God. I'm so tired.

K: I wonder why.

An alarm goes off.


  1. HI-larious. My roommate's cat used to sleep under the covers with me and on her own. She knew her way out. Our current cats aren't interested.

  2. Anonymous9:48 PM

    snort, love it! my cat never would deign to be covered in any way. may he get the hang of it soon!

  3. you have the patience of Job.

  4. Laughing my ass off.

  5. Naomi B.8:22 AM

    Cute definitely does not make up for loss of sleep, however... so cute!

  6. What a sweetie. My first dog used to sleep on the foot of my bed, but that was before I shared my bed with another human being. All of my dogs have been too big to share with two.

  7. hahaha my dog Max does this too and now I don't even feel it...he learned how to get out and in on his own.

  8. I swear I left a comment here earlier.

    The winter our power went out because of an ice storm, Hooper and I were home alone and had to tough out the night until Chris could come get us in the morning. I piled every blanket onto the bed and lit all the candles I could find. Then I tried to get Hooper to lay next to me on the bed. He lasted five minutes. He's never been a snuggly dog.

    At least you have someone to keep you warm during a power outage.

  9. Might be my favorite post. Well, after the RDJ hot people. :-)

  10. Hilarious. I wish Goldie would sleep with me. But no. I move around too much.